Journals/Nayeli - Baby Book Entry 2

922 Hoadly

Siobhan's insistence on having a biological connection to the baby caught me by surprise (no offense, dear daughter/son/other). CHORUS strongly prefers adoptions, and I could have been happy with that. But Colm - that's your...uncle, I guess - was willing to donate. Has a lot of time on his hands, that one. And Siobhan, your other mama ... wore me down.

She and I have...never disagreed before, the sensation was so disruptive I hardly knew what to do. And so I went with it, and so we lied. I've never felt such disquiet. But when you're here, maybe I'll see her eyes in yours, or maybe someone from my side of the family... and that'll help with the guilt.